Thursday, April 7, 2011

Hooray...tomorrow is the last day of radiation!!! Autumn is just about over it all right now. Each day as she climbs out of bed she absolutely begs me NOT to go to Santa Barbara. "Not Santa Barbara again!" she cries in frustration. A child that small simply cannot understand what is going on, why there are so many tasks to be done, why is she not doing what she normally does, as if we as adults have any clue, or can offer any sort of insight into such a world we hardly understand ourselves.

With children, the beauty lies in their innocence and more importantly in their perspective. They do not anticipate and project the future as an adult would, they live in the present and react to what pain or happiness that is occurring within the immediate future. Adults languish in their pain and discomfort for much longer than do children.

Yesterday, Autumn was able to see her friends at preschool and what a treat that was! Her teacher, Mrs. Dottie is so sweet and caring and just made a little space for Autumn to enjoy and be creative for the short while we were there. Seeing Autumn with all of her friends was enough to break down any barrier I had built over the past three and a half weeks, I began to cry and think that life doesn't seem fair at times. Children should be exempt from the cruelty of life, they just haven't lived long enough to be burdened these occurrences. I must admit that if something like this doesn't make a parent appreciate life, then I cannot image what it would take. Life is beautiful and we cannot ever forget that, any of us. Every day is so precious and meaningful and way too short.

We are going to have a small celebration tomorrow for Autumn's last day of radiation, what a trooper!!

1 comment:

  1. My sister told about a month ago that Lorelei (who just turned 6) said to her when she get's older she is not taking medicine anymore and will never go back into the hospital. She is getting to the age where she is understanding and doesn't like it.
    And you are right it does make a parent appreciate life. I saw my sister change a lot. For the good I would say. Even though I would never wish any child to be sick it has opened my sister's eye's to what is important and that is EVERY day should be spent with awe and wonder! Because you never know what the next day will bring!
    Thinking of you every day!
    Bran and Greg